Obla di Obla da life goes on....

Sorry for the lack of updates. It has been a crazy summer. My children spent the summer with there grandmother. I had a week break from them while they went to camp then I had to go up north to watch them. So that was hectic. My mother (thank goodness) finally got out of the stone age with dial up and got road runner. So at least I wasn't hefting my computer to a local (15 min away) McDonalds to use there free internet this year to do my school work. I have also still had health issues this summer that have been making me extremely tired but I am normal according to my doctors.

I recently started the job search and have gotten a rejection notice for every single one of them. It is kind of disheartening but I know that something will come along. I need grown up interactions again. Being with two children (one during the day) is not stimulating during the day. I want a job so that I can have the money to do grown up things and to maybe make a friend or two.

Feeling lonely lately. I still feel the death of my friend even though she has been gone for a while. It is hard to see her house and I still feel as if she will show up any moment. I know that she will not but I still think that she will. I am tired as class has drained me. Too many papers. So adieu parting is such sweet sorrow. I will try to update this more when I have time.

Well the last couple of weeks have sucked. I found out the reason that I had been so sick was because I had a stomach infection. So I am now 5 days away from completing what is known as a PREVPAC. not fun at all I might add. Not only that but I fell down the stairs on Monday. I twisted my ankle pretty bad. It threw my hip out of place. Oh and the doctor informed me that not only in addition with my thyroid medication that I need to take I have a B12 deficiency. So that is why I haven't blogged. This medication is making me sick but hopefully it will be better when I am done with this medication. On a more positive note I am starting to write a book maybe a short story. it all depends how long I can make it I guess. so far it is 9 pages and I still have 10 hand written pages to transcribe. I keep adding to them so it is probably more then 10 now. I am excited. I am not sure if it will go anywhere but at least it is helping me to relieve the major amount of stress that I have been under. My only friend that I have in the area passed away. I miss her like crazy. She was older and it happened suddenly. Now I don't have anyone to talk to that isn't my husband or kids. I am kind of depressed lately because of it. The prospect of this book has brought just a little joy to my life. I don't make friends easily and I think that if I publish this book then I think that I will dedicate it to her. Well better get back to finishing my school work. So I'm off to see the wizard...    

Survival

Well I survived yesterday and am on to the new day. I start classes again today and am oddly optimistic about them even with the incredible amount of homework that involved with in them. Online classes are harder then in seat classes I have decided. I have done both now and the amount of work that they expect out of you in an online class is staggering. I never had this much work going to an in seat course. That and having two young children (sometimes three if you count my husband) to look after is hard. That and I have a thyroid problem that they are trying to regulate which makes me exhausted. I know this is a lot of whining but where else can I do this? I know that there are many other parents that think the way that I do but do not have a way to voice it.

Many people say thank god its Friday but for me I think thank god for Monday's. I am currently a stay at home mom. I recently got out of the Navy and decided that staying home until my children were able to go to school would be the best way to go. I am now rethinking this whole stay at home thing. I am amazed that people can be around children for so long without going insane. That is unless they too are like children. *side note now all I can see is a group of grown ups throwing themselves to the ground having a tantrum...it is kind of funny. 

I don't think that I could ever become a child care provider. I hate kids...not mine just everyone else's. My eldest son started kindergarten this year and I get a mini break from one of my children. My daughter plays well by herself and I can't complain much about that. I do not have family near by or anyone that can watch them. I love my kids but sometimes I wish that I could give them to grandma every once in a while so that I can take a bath without little fingers under the door. My husband tries to help but he does not always have control of them. When the whining starts with my son my daughter is at the parrot faze so she starts chiming in. I have gotten to the point that sometimes I start whining just to show them how silly they sound. This usually results in laughter and an end to the whining for the moment.

I live for the good moments though. I write this so that I can remember that the good times are there and no matter how stressed I am the good times are there. I just need this blog to vent for right now. It may not always be about me venting my frustrations but for now it is. Here is to another day of survival.

The First

Well here goes to this blog thing. I guess that I should start out by saying that this would be easier to write if I actually had time. I never seem to have any time to myself. Even trips to the bathroom are not meant for just me. I know that no one but me will see this but it is nice to vent it a little. I WANT SPACE. Many have a person that will help out or have a job so they can escape the incessant whining of children. Don't get me wrong I love my children but I never seem to have any selfish me time. ok well the brood is up so here goes the day. Wait with baited breath to see if I have survived the day to write again.

-Mommy Pulling Out Her Hair...